A Crucial Week Ahead

We have two big prayer requests this week:

First, Kaylee is having some medical tests done on Wednesday by the pediatric GI doctor to determine the cause of some bleeding she's been having for the past few months. It's very likely to be a minor problem, but there are some scary possibilities too. Please pray that the procedure itself is not too traumatic for her, and mostly, pray for good results!

Second, I've mentioned our friends the Mahoney's who are adopting Israel's best friend and have stood side-by-side with us throughout this entire process. This week, in response to the concerns we all have about the process, they will be doing some special investigating as to the status of our case. We can't give many details right now, but we ask you to pray that the Lord will use this week to accomplish much! We are praying for clear information, for honesty from everyone involved, and for progress in our cases. We pray for everyone involved to be filled with wisdom through the Holy Spirit that we will be sensitive to the Lord's leading and walk according to His will.

Thank you so much for praying along with us this week--we know that "the effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much." (James 5:16)

Frustration and Disappoinment

For weeks now, we've been growing increasingly concerned over what "real" progress we have actually made in our case. By "real" progress, I mean that we are looking for crucial documents that come out of each of the four key offices involved in the Guatemalan adoption process. As our concern has grown, we've spent a LOT of time in prayer, asking God for direction as to how we should proceed with our agency and the other people involved in working on our case. After doing a lot of research and digging into any information that we can get our hands on, and even contacting the US Embassy in Guatemala for a status report, we became even more concerned that our agency may have missed some important steps early in the process. Through our prayers, and the wisdom that the Lord has given us, we prepared ourselves for a meeting with our agency to address our concerns. This meeting took place yesterday.

We left the meeting tremendously disappointed for two reasons, and we are asking you to continue to lift these two concerns to the Lord on our behalf, because we have confirmed that this battle for Israel will be won only by prayer and by the Lord's intervention. Our first and foremost prayer request is for the process itself. Unfortunately, the meeting confirmed what we thought: we have made very little real progress on this case from a legal standpoint. Our case has been in Guatemala for 8 months now, and we are still lacking the key documents from 3 of the 4 offices involved! According to our agency, this is the result of the constantly changing political and legal environment surrounding Guatemalan adoptions, and we know that this is certainly a part of the problem. Unfortunately, all along, we have been given the distinct impression that everything in Guatemala was progressing fine, and as long ago as December, our agency was beginning to discuss travel information with us. Imagine our disappointment yesterday when we confirmed that we are essentially in the beginning stages of the legal system there! What does this mean? Unless the Lord intervenes, Israel could be waiting for months and months more. It would be miraculous for him to be home this summer, and we are preparing ourselves for the possibility that we may not be with him to celebrate his 12th birthday in December.

Our second source of disappointment and frustration is our conviction of the fact that our agency is not being completely honest with us about what has been happening with our case over the last 8 months. It appears that crucial steps were missed early on because of our agency and their Guatemalan staff's lack of understanding of what is required, and that we are waiting now because those steps have yet to be completed. During our meeting yesterday, we voiced our questions about the specific areas we feel that they have not been honest with us, and the explanations given were simply not sufficient. They did not acknowledge any errors on their part, despite the documentation we had to support our concerns. Although our agency presented us with some documentation, they were not able to show us the one key form that could have resolved all of our questions. They insist that it has been completed and is in the possession of our attorneys, but we can only assume--since we requested this particular document well in advance of the meeting and they were unable to produce it--that this is just another excuse. The discussion with the agency president went on for some time, and was tense and heated at times, and in the end, we were promised that they would obtain a copy of this document right away. We pray that they do and that the dates on it show that they are being truthful with us about when this part of the process was actually initiated.

We have been through quite a variety of emotions since we walked out of that meeting yesterday. We are disappointed, frustrated, angry, and concerned. It grieves our hearts to feel this profound lack of unity and distrust with people who are fellow believers. We are exhausted by the journey we have had so far, and it still looks like we have a huge mountain to climb. And most of all, we are desperate to have Israel here with us. So with all this going on, we have only one option: we go back to what we know...

1. We KNOW that God brought this exact child to us through this exact agency according to His perfect design. (Psalm 18:30)
2. We KNOW that God's calling on our hearts to adopt Israel was clear and confirmed by a multitude of scriptures and circumstances. (Isaiah 30:21)
3. We KNOW that God's plan for our lives and for Israel's life is perfect and that God is not surprised or upset by the circumstances we are currently facing. (Jeremiah 29:11)
4. We KNOW that nothing is impossible with God. (Luke 1: 37 and 18: 27)
5. We KNOW that, as difficult as this is for us, we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us. (Philippians 4:13)
6. We KNOW that in all things, God works for the good of those who love Him and who have been called according to His purpose. (Romans 8:28)
7. We KNOW that the Lord is faithful and that when we put our hope in Him we will not be disappointed (pretty much any of the Psalms!)

We will continue to cling to the things that God has made clear to us through the promises of His word, and we ask that you continue to pray along with us that Almighty God will display His power and might and remove the mountains that are standing our way. Together, we will pray Israel home!

Psalm 121: 1-4

"I lift up my eyes to the hills--where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth.
He will not let your foot slip--He who watches over you will not slumber;
indeed, He who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep."

We are asking all of our family and friends to please continue to lift up our family to the Lord asking for Him to bring about the completion of this adoption. With each passing week, the circumstances surrounding our case cause us more concern over how much has been accomplished up to this point, how much is left to be done, and how prepared our agency is for the steps ahead. To be completely honest, we do not have a whole lot of confidence in any person, agency, attorney, or official right now. We feel like the process changes almost daily and the answers to our questions from one week are null and void the next week.

We have asked the Lord for wisdom and clear direction in how to respond, and He is continually directing us to keep looking to Him, trusting in Him, waiting for Him. I've read verse after verse after verse reminding me of His power, His love, and His faithfulness. These are truths that will never be called into question, and we are confident that as we trust in Him, He will make our path straight. It is difficult, though, because everything in me wants to push harder, make more phone calls, ask more questions, call meetings with everybody involved, and insist on more clarification and confirmation. And yet I am reminded..."Not by might, nor by power, but by My Spirit says the Lord Almighty" (Zechariah 4:6).

So please pray with us. We know that God began writing this adoption story without any help or interference from us, and He will write the final chapter as well. In the meantime, we will pray...and pray...and pray.

We're Back in Court...

Our agency told us this afternoon that our case has been resubmitted to the family court. This is the part where we have to pray for a favorable, honorable judge and a social worker who is divinely motivated to complete the necessary paperwork quickly! Please keep praying with us. The drama surrounding adoptions in Guatemala continues, as the PGN has put a month-long hold on all the cases currently at that stage so they can investigate each case and look for signs of fraud. We don't know whether or not the investigations there will affect the work of the courts. As you can imagine, this weighs on us heavily, and we continue to pray constantly and cling to the Lord, knowing that He is in control. Last night, I was greatly encouraged by Isaiah 29: 23

"When they see among them their children, the work of my hands, they will keep my name holy; they will acknowledge the holiness of the Holy One of Jacob, and will stand in awe of the God of Israel."

Israel belongs to the Lord, and He is doing the work to bring Him home in the middle of what seems like an impossible situation. One day, when Israel is here with us, just looking at Him will be a reminder of all that God has done to bring it about. And we will all stand in awe of the God of Israel!

Do You Ever Feel Like You're In One of These?

We are still waiting to hear about whether our case has been submitted to court or not. We thought it would be submitted by Friday, but we've heard that now we are waiting for a document from the US Embassy. With every update, it seems that the process has changed before our very eyes. Please pray for wisdom for us in how to respond to these changes...we have some concerns that we may need to discuss with our agency. As the changes happen and we twist and turn our way through this maze, the Lord is reminding us that our faith is in HIM and no other. So even though we feel a little lost amongst the hedges, we are so thankful that we're walking with the Gardener!

A Little Time Away

Isn't it amazing how God knows exactly what we need when we need it? We couldn't sign up to go to the Marriage Retreat with our church this year because we weren't sure if and when we'd be going to Guatemala, so when we realized that wasn't going to happen just yet, we were a little disappointed. Then Thursday night, at the last minute, another couple couldn't go and graciously gave us their spot--yay!

It was just what we needed...a little time away together, a break from the weight of our wait, and, for me, some really needed insights into where God wants me right now. (Hint: when I say "insights" I really mean "attitude adjustment").

In the middle of all the good things we want to accomplish in our lives, all the areas we know we need to change, and all the relationships we want to work on, it's so easy to forget that we only have one job on this planet. Follow Jesus. That's it. He does the work, He makes the changes, He directs our path. My job is just to follow.

I have a tendency to want to make a plan, find a way, establish a change and I'm constantly frustrating myself. So whether it's keeping our family on a more consistent schedule, finding time to exercise more, or trying to complete an adoption I just need to follow Jesus with complete faith that He who began the good work in us will be faithful to complete it!

Lord, please clear the path before us...

I think most of you may know what we learned about our case while I was in Guatemala two weeks ago, but just in case, a quick recap: In March, we were in PGN, which is typically the last step to becoming Israel's legal parents, and we thought we were almost done. Within the last few weeks, however, we found out that we are having to backtrack and pick up an important step that got skipped earlier on in the process. We never completed family court back in January, so now that we have everything else done, we are going back. In order to re-submit, the courts requested some additional documents, which we scurried around to collect and verify so that I could take them with me to Guatemala.

So, two weeks ago, we turned over a fresh mountain of paperwork to our attorneys, and after two weeks of translating, protocol-ing, notarizing, and otherwise "officializing" our documents, we expect to be submitted back into court TODAY. This is huge because it should be the last step, but it could be a very long one.

To add another layer of drama to all of this is the fact that there is complete craziness going on with adoptions in general in Guatemala right now. You may remember that the attorney general was removed from office against his will...Well, there is a bit of a power struggle going on there between the newly appointed attorney general and the old one. All cases currently in PGN are caught in the middle and on hold while the new powers-that-be audit all the adoption cases for signs of fraud. We aren't in PGN right now, so it shouldn't affect us, but there is a ton of scrutiny over all adoptions, so we really don't know how it could all play out in the end.

Soooooo, now that the background is all laid out for you, here's what we're praying for:

1. That the Lord will clear the path before us so that no more obstacles delay the completion of this process!

2. That our documents will be complete, accurate, and completely void of any qualities that could make them look suspicious or problematic in any way.

3. That both cases--ours and our friends,the Mahoney's--will stay together throughout the remaining steps so that the boys can come home at the same time.

4. That every attorney, secretary, judge, social worker, agency staff, or official of any kind that handles our case will be inspired by the power of God to do their work quickly, fairly and accurately in order to place these boys with their families!

5. Last, but not least, that the Father of the fatherless will be near to the hearts of Israel & Wilmer as they wait to come home, giving them peace, comfort, and understanding.

With all that is going on, it's very easy to feel like this situation is completely out of control. But we know, and we have seen, how God's wisdom far exceeds our limited understanding. Two weeks ago, we were upset that we had skipped over this step in family court and wondered why we couldn't just go through the steps in order. But now, with all that's going on in PGN, we're praising God that our case isn't there! It's great to read the Old Testament and see how the Lord used kings of nations to accomplish His purposes for His people...Scripture is very clear that our God is the defender of orphans, and so we rest knowing that even the political drama at play right now in Guatemala will not derail God's plans for Israel.

Our Adoption Story

As we continually post updates on our adoption process, there may be some who haven't heard the whole story on how we began this journey. So here's a little history on how the Lord has written our story...

Jeremy and I have been talking about adoption for a long time. It's hard to pinpoint a specific moment at which the desire began, but rather it grew slowly through little conversations and situations here and there until we found ourselves talking very seriously about when and how we would adopt. Looking back, we know that God planted those seeds long, long ago and over the course of time, He used circumstances and experiences in our lives to prepare us for His calling.

After we had committed ourselves to adoption, we had a small problem...literally. Our house was too small for more kids. So, for us, the path to one process took us through another process--an addition to our house. That is a story all it's own, but we're done now, so I'll leave it at that!

So last April, Jeremy & I were sitting on the couch talking about how, now that the addition was wrapping up, it was time to start looking into our options for an adoption. We had a few ideas about which agency we might use, and we had decided that we would adopt a younger child through a domestic adoption; we knew that there was no way we could afford an international adoption! I think God listens for us to make statements like that and then uses it as an opportunity to display His amazing power & ability to do the impossible!

That particular conversation ended with our decision to pray specifically and look for God to lead us to the starting point, and within 2 weeks, Israel showed up at our door...

My sister Jamie and her husband Ben used an agency here in Southern California to do their homestudy for their second adoption. This agency does a program called Welcome Home where they bring a group of orphans here from another country for “vacation.” Of course, the whole point is really to find families for these kids, but the kids are just meant to understand it as a fun trip. So in May 2007, my sister and her family agreed to be a host family for a little boy from Guatemala. Although they were originally supposed to host a different boy, his Visa fell through at the last minute, and so Israel came to their house instead.

For more than a week, I had conversations with Jamie on the phone, listening as she told me, “There is just something special about this kid!” She would tell me stories about fun experiences he was having and I caught myself one time as I thought, “He will have so many stories to tell when he goes back home! What will his family think?!” The sudden realization that he had no family to share his experiences with stuck in my heart. As we talked throughout the first part of his time here, my thoughts began to change from “I hope a family is found for him, but I know this isn’t what God has for us,” to “Lord, are you trying to show me something?” I began to pray, and I shared my thoughts with my sister, but I didn’t say anything to Jeremy about it. If God was going to change our plans, I wanted Him to put it on Jeremy’s heart without any help from me.

Finally, two weeks into Israel’s trip, we were able to have my sister’s family over for dinner so we could meet this little guy we had been hearing so much about. Jeremy still didn’t know anything about the thoughts God had been putting on my heart, but I was praying that God would reveal His plan for us. That night we had dinner, and I watched carefully for any reaction from Jeremy. Nothing. I was a little confused, but I told my sister the next day, “Jeremy didn’t say anything one way or another. I guess this isn’t the direction God has for us.” Later that afternoon, though, Jeremy came home from work and the girls were still napping. It was strange for us to have an opportunity to have an actual conversation in the middle of the afternoon, and as we sat and chatted about the day, Israel’s name came up. I was telling Jeremy something Israel had said or done at my sister’s house, and Jeremy looked at me and said, “You know, I would be open to adopting him, but I know that’s an idea you may have a hard time with.”

I wish there was a photographer in the room to capture what my face must have looked like when he said that! I was floored! I told him that I had been thinking about the possibility of adopting him too, but that I thought he wouldn’t be open to the idea. So there we sat, looking at each other in astonishment, with thoughts swimming through our minds of the magnitude of the decision before us. We talked a lot more, and decided to pray and seek for clarification from God as to what we should do. Over the next few days, we prayed and talked a lot, wanting to be certain that this was the child God had chosen for our family. We only shared what was going on with a very few people

I remember driving by myself to drop off food at our church’s Homeless Ministry, praying and listening to a Christian radio station, hoping that the Lord would use the car speakers to give me direction. As I walked in, dropped off the food, and walked back out, I was hoping that someone would somehow see the confusion in my mind and ask me about it so I could unburden my heart. I said hi to a few people and started towards my car, a little disappointed, when one of the sweetest, most compassionate people I know came after me. I had already said hi to her and continued on, but she was coming toward me saying, “Kristy, I wanted to ask you, how are you? How can I be praying for you?” The question I had been waiting for! I shared with her a little, and she agreed to pray along with us, and I walked to my car thanking God for sending her to talk to me at the exact moment I needed her.

As I drove home, I kept listening to the radio, waiting for more clarification. I listened intently to the pastor’s moment that plays between songs, and got nothing. The verse of the day? It didn’t really apply. Then, as I pulled into my driveway, a Steven Curtis Chapman song came on…

My heart is racing, and my knees are weak as I walk to the edge. I know there’s no turning back once my feet have left the ledge.
And in the rush I hear a voice that’s telling me it’s time to take the leap of faith
So here I go!

I’m diving in, I’m going deep. In over my head, I want to be.
Caught in the rush, lost in the flow,in over my head, I want to go.
The river’s deep, the river’s wide, the river’s water is alive,
So sink or swim, I’m diving in!

I laughed to myself as I got out of the car. “Ok, Lord. I’m listening.”

The next day was Friday. We had met Israel only two days before. Jeremy was certain that this was God’s will for us, but I was still searching for clarity. We stood in the garage that afternoon, talking. Ok, Jeremy was talking. I was mostly crying. I just wanted to be certain, with no doubts, that this was the path God had chosen for us. I was afraid that if we made a wrong choice, we would bring heartache and frustration on ourselves and our girls. Jeremy asked me, “What are you waiting for? A postcard from God?” Yes! That’s exactly what I wanted…then I would know for sure. I was completely agitated at that point. I couldn’t think straight or sit still or concentrate on anything else. That’s when I knew I had to sit down with my Bible and do some listening.

As I was sitting there with my Bible in my lap, the phone rang. It was my sister, calling to offer me some encouragement. She said, “I thought it might help you if I read you some of my journals when we were making our decision to adopt Cameron.” Again, God sent me an encourager at exactly the right time. She read me some of the questions that she had asked herself, and they were nearly identical to mine. Then she shared some Bible passages she thought might help, and left me to my searching. At her recommendation, I started in Exodus where God calls Moses to be the one to deliver Israel out of Egypt. Moses questions God and doubts himself. I like Moses. I can relate to Moses. Then I went to Isaiah, one of my favorite books, and read verse after verse that applied.

“Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, ‘Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?’ And I said, ‘Here am I. Send me!’” (6:8)

“If you do not stand firm in your faith, you will not stand at all.” (7:9)

“You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in You. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord, the Lord, is the Rock eternal.” (26:3-4)

“When they see among them their children, the work of my hands, they will keep my name holy; they will acknowledge the holiness of the Holy One of Jacob, and will stand in awe of the God of Israel.” (29:23)

“Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, ‘This is the way; walk in it.’” (30:21)

“I took you from the ends of the earth. From its farthest corners I called you. I said, ‘You are my servant’; I have chosen you and have not rejected you. So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” (41:9-10)

And finally, the Lord brought me along to Isaiah 44:1-5, where I found the postcard I had been waiting for:

But now, listen, O Jacob, my servant, Israel, whom I have chosen. This is what the Lord says—He who made you, who formed you in the womb, and who will help you: Do not be afraid, O Jacob, my servant, Jeshurun whom I have chosen. For I will pour water on the thirsty land, and streams on the dry ground; I will pour out my Spirit on your offspring, and my blessing on your descendants. They will spring up like grass in a meadow, like poplar trees by flowing streams. One will say, ‘I belong to the Lord’; another will call himself by the name of Jacob; still another will write on his hand, ‘The Lord’s’ and will take the name Israel.”

From that point forward, I have been certain that Israel was chosen by God to be our son. There is no doubt in my mind that the Lord will complete this journey as He began it—by His power and through the guidance of His Spirit. And, by His grace, we will complete this journey as we began it—in the faith that comes from prayer, the searching of His word, and the encouragement of our brothers and sisters, adopted, like us, into the family of believers.